Go here to read the introduction to this series.
Day 5 – Going back 9/6/17
Today, I have found myself pining after the technology I left at home – particularly all the music I access through Wi-Fi. Reading has seemed rather tedious. Perhaps I am missing my access to mindless, social media entertainment.
My desire to return to technology forces me to ask some difficult questions, primarily: why would I want to go back? I know that my obsession with technology is wrong; we should only be obsessed with Jesus. While reading can be hard, I know it is inherently beneficial. My logic tells me I am in the right place, but my emotions want to take me back to the wonderful world of Wi-Fi. I guess reading rather than using Wi-Fi is kind of like eating vegetables: we resist eating them, even though they are essential to good health. Mindless entertainment sources, such as social media, are like candy: moderation is a must, even though the natural inclination is to binge. So while I want to go back, I know I should practice self-discipline and press on.
Besides, there is so much to enjoy here in the woods. I spotted a butterfly with a stunning orange and yellow mosaic pattern on its wings. We hiked Benny Creek which was gorgeous-as always. These familiar places bring back so many wonderful memories from past camping trips.
Day 6 – Still, peaceful mind 9/7/17
I have heard people say that they are able to think clearly when they are enjoying nature. Sometimes I feel the exact opposite is true for me. I have noticed that my mind is often more chaotic, even fearful, when I am out in the quiet outdoors. Perhaps the external quietness magnifies my internal anxieties. Normally, I live in a somewhat chaotic state, surrounded by constant distractions (most of which are Wi-Fi related). But in the woods, I am distraction free and left to confront my cluttered mind.
This trend seems fairly consistent. As we were hiking Butler trail today, I remembered how the last time we hiked this very same trail, I spent the whole time trying to meditate on scriptures. I tried to do this today as well, but I had many distracting, random thoughts fluttering through my mind. Sometimes my imagination is my own worst enemy. Even though being without Wi-Fi seems to reveal more chaos, I would rather face the problem than simply cover it up with increased distractions and chaos. Peace and quiet are often the best reminders to face the anxiety and fear we harbor inside.